Bollywood, one of the largest film industries in the world, has a significant influence on societal norms and behaviours. A concerning trend in Bollywood cinema is the romanticization of stalking behaviour, often portrayed as a legitimate and even charming way to pursue a romantic interest. This portrayal can have harmful consequences, particularly in shaping the perceptions and behaviours of susceptible audiences.
Bollywood films frequently depict male protagonists engaging in persistent, unwanted advances towards female characters, who eventually fall in love with their stalkers. This narrative suggests that persistence in the face of rejection is romantic rather than inappropriate or threatening.
Examples of Romanticized Stalking in Bollywood
Darr (1993): In this movie, Shah Rukh Khan's character relentlessly stalks Juhi Chawla's character, obsessively declaring, "I love you, Kiran." and “ tu haan kar ya na kar , tu hai meri Kiran” in its most famous song. Despite his menacing behaviour, the film gained immense popularity, and Shah Rukh's character even garnered sympathy from the audience.
Raanjhanaa (2013): The protagonist, played by Dhanush, engages in relentless pursuit of his love interest, even harming himself to gain her attention. The film presents his obsessive behaviour as a form of passionate love, downplaying the invasive and troubling nature of his actions.
Ae Dil Hai Mushkil (2016): The male lead, Ayan (played by Ranbir Kapoor), continuously pursues Alizeh (played by Anushka Sharma) despite her clear indications that she does not reciprocate his romantic feelings. His persistence is portrayed as endearing and romantic, reinforcing the idea that not taking 'no' for an answer is a valid approach to relationships.
Toilet: Ek Prem Katha (2017): The male lead, played by Akshay Kumar, stalks his future wife by taking her photographs without her consent and following her around. His behaviour is depicted humorously and ultimately leads to a successful romance.
Badrinath Ki Dulhania (2017): The male lead, Badrinath Bansal (played by Varun Dhawan), persistently pursues Vaidehi (played by Alia Bhatt) despite her initial disinterest. His relentless efforts to win her over include following her and trying to control her decisions. The film presents Badrinath's behaviour as comedic and endearing, eventually leading to Vaidehi falling in love with him. This reinforces the idea that persistence in the face of rejection is a legitimate romantic strategy.
Zero (2018): The male lead, Bauua Singh (played by Shah Rukh Khan), persistently pursues Aafia (played by Anushka Sharma), a scientist with cerebral palsy, despite her clear disinterest and personal boundaries. Bauua's relentless pursuit is depicted as humorous and heartwarming, ultimately leading to a romantic relationship. This narrative minimises the importance of consent and personal space.
Kabir Singh (2019): The male lead, Kabir Singh (played by Shahid Kapoor), exhibits obsessive and controlling behaviour towards his love interest, Preeti (played by Kiara Advani). His actions include physically assaulting her and dictating her life choices. Despite his abusive behaviour, the film portrays Kabir as a passionate lover, and his actions are ultimately justified and forgiven. This romanticization of toxic masculinity sends a dangerous message about acceptable behaviour in relationships.
Hacked (2020): In this film, the protagonist, played by Rohan Shah, hacks into the personal devices of his love interest, played by Hina Khan, after she rejects his advances. He uses this access to control her life and intimidate her
A Concerning Trend
From 1993's "Darr" to 2020's "Hacked," Bollywood has continually portrayed stalking behaviour as a form of romantic pursuit. This long-standing trend raises questions about the messages these films intend to convey and whether the industry is perpetuating such narratives simply because they are popular and profitable. The persistence of this theme suggests a troubling normalisation of invasive and harmful behaviours under the guise of romance.
By portraying stalking as an acceptable form of courtship, these films normalise behaviours that are invasive and can be terrifying for the victim. Young audiences may internalise these behaviours as normal and acceptable ways to express love and affection, potentially leading to real-life instances of harassment and stalking. These portrayals reinforce problematic gender dynamics, where male persistence is rewarded and female autonomy and consent are undermined.
Simone De Beauvoir discusses how women are often socialised to accept passivity and submission, viewing themselves through the lens of male desire and pursuit. Bollywood's romanticization of stalking mirrors these societal expectations, presenting women as passive recipients of male attention and normalising intrusive behaviours as expressions of love. This dynamic undermines the concept of consent and perpetuates harmful stereotypes about gender roles.
A critical media education approach encourages viewers to deconstruct these narratives and consider healthier representations of gender relations. For example, discussing the glorification of abusive behaviour in "Kabir Singh" can lead to broader conversations about respect, consent, and mutual understanding in relationships.
While Bollywood has a profound impact on its audience, it also has a responsibility to portray behaviours and relationships in a manner that promotes healthy and respectful interactions. By moving away from romanticising stalking, Bollywood can contribute to changing societal attitudes and fostering a culture that values consent and mutual respect. Films should clearly depict stalking and harassment as unacceptable behaviours with real consequences and create strong, autonomous female characters who assert their boundaries and make independent choices about their relationships.
Bollywood's romanticization of stalking behaviour is a significant issue that highlights the need for critical media education.Through critical engagement and resistance, audiences can advocate for more responsible and empowering portrayals, promoting healthier and more respectful relationships
For young boys and girls who watch Bollywood, these depictions can be very harmful as they normalize unacceptable behavior. Boys therefore believe they are supposed to engage in such behavior where they ‘chase’ after girls in order to make them gain interest. Young girls who do not recognize that this could be dangerous and harmful also believe it to be normal behavior from men and would expect men to chase after them. There is a prevailing norm in society to this day where women are asked and advised to go for men who like them rather than pursuing a relationship with someone they themselves are interested in.
The blog highlights a critical issue in bollywood films, which is also prevalent in our society. The romanticization of stalking behaviour is problematic in many ways, majorly owing to how they normalize invasive behaviour, undermine the concept of consent and portray stalking as an appropriate way of pursuing your lover. However, all the films you mentioned as example of the phenomenon are movies which received incredible success in box office, Why do you think such films achieve the success that they get. Are these films introducing such behaviors into the society or are they rooted in cultural familiarity? If such narratives sell well, how do you think such an issue can be tackled given all movie houses have commercial incentives…
Stalking Behaviour in the form of romantic pursuit presented in these films highlights the normalization of very unhealthy behavior. These ideas are not just limited to Bollywood but are presented in almost every romantic film where women's roles are bound to get attention and love from males. In contrast, males go to toxic routes to prove their love and passion towards specific women. An important aspect to mention here is that these films blur the boundaries between affection and harassment, which makes it difficult for viewers to differentiate between healthy and unhealthy behaviors. Due to this, there are many serious negative real-life consequences for society. Males often believe stalking is the right thing to do, which may cause distress to…
Bollywood's portrayals of pursuing a love interest can initiate the wrong idea of love and affection in society. The issue is deeply rooted in societal expectations and gender roles, where male persistence is valorized, and female autonomy is often overlooked. In our society, men are always taught they can get what they want. Whereas women are expected to compromise on what they have been given. They are not allowed to choose what they want. This upbringing indirectly instills the idea of getting any girl if the men keep pushing her to show the same love interest towards them even though they have already rejected them. Bollywood has to change the representation of love and affection in their films. Audiences must…
"Bollywood's romanticization of stalking in films like 'Darr' and 'Kabir Singh' reinforces negative preconceptions about relationships and consent. These storylines not only normalize invasive behavior, but also send a harmful message to audiences, particularly young viewers, about what constitutes acceptable courtship. It is critical that media, particularly Bollywood and beyond, represent relationships responsibly and reflect the ideals of respect and consent. This pattern is not limited to Bollywood; similar subjects may be seen in Pakistani media, such as the drama series "Deewangi" and the telefilm "Roohposh". For example, dramas may show persistent pursuit as a love gesture, blurring the distinction between persistence and harassment. This image, though dramatized, has the potential to affect society's perceptions and behaviors, shaping how people…